The fabulous Deborah Monk told me years ago that she was going to write a book called Dance Lessons for Life, because she found that so many of the things she was saying to her ballroom students were pieces of advice that could be implemented in the rest of one’s life, to great benefit. This morning I found myself saying, “Make a choice, and commit!” to one of my students, about her arm styling.

Immediately I thought of conversations with my mom, during which she frequently can’t hear or understand something I’ve said (a combination of my mumbling and her hearing, I believe). Often I find myself loath to say what I’ve said, louder. I wonder if what I’ve said is even worthwhile, and often I don’t want to repeat it loudly and clearly. The first time I said it, it was just a passing thought that popped out of my mouth, without much introspection, sometimes even without a purpose.

I think of my husband, whose teaching catch phrase is, “I MEANT to take that step! I MEANT to take that step!” He’s trying to get his students to think about every step they take, understand exactly where it’s supposed to go, and then take it, firmly and with control and discipline. There are too many times when feet are placed willy-nilly, riding on the momentum of the previous action.

I feel like this applies in so many areas of my life. My existence is overflowing with “choices” that I may not even realize I’ve made. I’m just kind of going with the flow. How can I apply the things that Ray and I are telling our students, to my life?

• I’m going to choose to go to bed at the time that will give me enough sleep for a healthy body, not wait until I’m too exhausted to go through the bedtime routine that’s in my own best interest.
• I’m going to put down whatever I’m doing and look my daughters in the eyes when they’re speaking to me; because nothing in this world is more important to me than giving them my full attention, and making sure they know I hear them and I care about what they’re saying.
• I’m going to call my mom regularly and make sure I’m seeing her at least weekly, instead of letting my schedule fill up and then trying to squeeze her in as an afterthought. She's been my best friend for over 45 years, and she deserves my best, not my last.
• I’m not going to let myself check social media or play online Scrabble before 8pm, because those are both rabbit holes that are too easy to fall into.

It’s helping to write these things down. I need to come back and re-read them regularly, to make sure that I not only “Make the choice,” but “COMMIT!”

What are you going to MEAN to do, and then DO?