I almost didn't go on my morning walk today. My back and both of my knees were really hurting, it was chilly, and I was just very grumpy overall. But I went anyway, and I'm so glad I did! It's a beautiful day outside, the sun is shining, and there's a light breeze blowing through the incredible fall colors decorating the trees.

The Chase

It reminds me of a story I read a long time ago, which I just found again in Zen Flesh, Zen Bones, a collection of writings edited by Paul Reps and Nyogen Senzaki. It goes like this: One day while walking through the wilderness a man stumbled upon a vicious tiger. He ran but soon came to the edge of a high cliff. Desperate to save himself, he climbed down a vine and dangled over the fatal precipice. As he hung there, two mice appeared from a hole in the cliff and began gnawing on the vine. Suddenly, he noticed on the vine a plump wild strawberry. He plucked it and popped it in his mouth. It was incredibly delicious!

Where's the Rest of the Story?

The first time I read this story, I was confused. I flipped to the next page, thinking there must be more to the story. But that was it! It was incredibly delicious! And the story ends there.

Don't Let Your Mind Stop You

I think the point is that life is always going to send you one catastrophe or another - or maybe several at the same time - but it will only be your mind that will prevent you from stopping and recognizing the good and the beautiful around you. So, even though I was grumpy, my mind didn't stop me from enjoying the walk this morning.

Just Show Up

My meniscus repair surgery is just a month away. I think about how I taught hours of dance lessons the night before each of my C-sections; and how my daughter and I auditioned for "Shrek" together the night before my hysterectomy. I'm so glad I did those things. My surgeries would've come whether I'd been out doing what I wanted to do the night before, or whether I'd stayed home worrying about them. I think of the phrase "Just Show Up," and how a lot of times we defeat ourselves in our minds before the moment of truth ever comes. We don't trust that, by just showing up, a lot of things will fall into place on their own.

Nurture Your Courage

My mother and I apparently have an unintentional competition: to see which one of us starts crying first while watching the movie It's a Wonderful Life each Christmas. I think I hold the record - I started crying last year when the three stars are speaking to each other in the very first scene. Clarence asks the Lord, "Is he sick?" and God replies, "No, worse. He's discouraged." It is terrible to be sick or in pain; but it can be so much worse if we are discouraged and have lost heart. I want to take good care of my body; but more than anything, I want to nurture my courage. Just keep going for walks, just keep showing up, just keep reaching for the strawberries.