This morning I had to pay the piper.

A couple of weeks ago, I made a mistake that caused a lot of problems. It wasn’t an intentional choice on my part; but it was still my fault, because I dropped the ball by not staying on top of our family schedule, and not getting all of the facts before agreeing to a new activity. Today I had to take responsibility for what I’d done, and to do what I could to make it right.

I was stressing over it during the last week, trying to figure out what to do. Yesterday, after realizing that it was going to impact many more folks than just our family, and hearing my head-chatter run around in circles, I used what I believe Ethan Kross called Temporal Distancing [in HIDDEN BRAIN: YOU 2.0: BEFRIENDING YOUR INNER VOICE ON APPLE PODCASTS]. I tried to picture the same scenario as it may play out 6 months or a year in the future. I realized that one choice may have been preferable to me or my family personally, and possible granted some immediate gratification (or at least avoided immediate and maybe long-term escape from discomfort); but that choice would have had a negative impact on a lot more people, who didn’t deserve all the problems it was going to cause for them. The correct choice demonstrated respect for the commitment we’d made first. And when it comes down to it, I want my kids to see me make mistakes. I want them to know that I realize I make mistakes, and that I know I made one. And then I want them to see me do my best to make it right. It reminds me of the book THE GIFT OF FAILURE — JESSICA LAHEY. If I want my kids to know that it’s OK to make mistakes, I have to let them see me make them – and then see me do the best I can to fix them, and move on.

So I’m going to try to stay as positive as I can about this situation, and see what I can learn from it. Let’s see…

·        Update the family schedule as soon as I have new dates

·        Check all the requirements of a new activity we’re considering before agreeing to it

·        Schedule in some down time – to be with my people, and to use as flex time when things don’t go strictly according to plan!

This last one is the toughest. The others are sort of no-brainers. Yesterday I had big plans for all of the things I was going to get done. I dove into my day like a torpedo, and by the time I came up for air, I was late for somewhere I needed to be, and I hadn’t even taken my shower yet. I know I am scheduling too much for myself; and yet I still feel like I’m not getting enough done. No wonder my kids are over-scheduling themselves. It’s scary to stop and look at your life and your thoughts – it's much more comfortable to just keep plowing ahead, through your to-do list – but when things are constantly falling through the cracks and you’re always feeling like you're letting someone down, that’s pretty uncomfortable too. And here I am starting a new blog and website! I’m funny. Hopefully Bright Eyes Bushy Tail really will help me – and maybe you, too – to keep my priorities in the right order, by giving me a vehicle to reflect on what actually fills my moments. I’d love to hear your thoughts!